


You Are the Brightest Star

by Pseudologia



Category: Kings
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Manly Tears, bleak bleak bleak everything is bleak, fluff sandwiched between angst, jack has way too many feelings, joseph just wants to be gay in both senses of the word, monarchies are a bitch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-15
Updated: 2012-09-15
Packaged: 2017-11-14 06:44:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/512435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pseudologia/pseuds/Pseudologia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After his father's threats, Jack is determined to drive Joseph out of his life for good. Unfortunately, his heart and his brain aren't exactly on the same page.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Are the Brightest Star

**Author's Note:**

> welp, i don't know exactly how to preface this, except that it's really emotional and romantic and basically all-around cheese-covered. like, it could attract mice. i hope that's acceptable.

Jack watched as Joseph was thrown out into the street, concentrating every cell of effort he had into making his face an expressionless mask as Joseph hit the concrete, a small pained groan escaping him as his wrists scraped against the dirty alleyway. Jack kept every fiber of his being under control and waited for Joseph to get up and walk away and never turn back. Jack _deserved_ to be left forever, he didn’t deserve the pursuit or affection of this man and he didn’t deserve to hold on to the memories of what they’d had before.

 

What he didn’t deserve was for Joseph to lift his face from the ground and look at him, composed but almost pleading; hurt but always understanding. Jack tried to stare back, expression blank, and not let it affect him, let it wash over him like he did so many things, but then he saw the small tears forming in the corners of Joseph’s eyes. Guilt and affection he didn’t deserve to feel – shouldn’t be feeling anyway – hit him so forcefully that he knew the torture was reading on his face.

 

Jack did what he always did when he could no longer stay composed: he turned around, walked away, and headed for the bar.

 

Jack sighed and stared down into his whiskey, wishing more than anything in the world that it could truly help him out of the mess he’d built for himself. He knew, deep down, that it never really could – in fact, it usually did the opposite – if he had too much he’d be drunk dialing Joseph from the very alley he’d had him thrown into within the hour. Instead of knocking it back, like every cell of his body was telling him to, Joseph sat and tried to think of where it had all gone wrong, tried to really think about how he’d gotten here; because how could he ever get out if he didn’t know when he’d fallen in?

 

Obviously, it all began with Joseph. Yeah, Jack had had his, uh, _encounters_ with other boys when he was a teenager, but Joseph was different, had always been different. Everything with Joseph had always seemed, ironically enough, simple. Whenever Jack was with Joseph, he could almost let himself forget that he was a prince or that this went against his entire family, because the thing was, Joseph _knew_. Joseph knew every little thing about Jack, had enjoyed asking him questions since their first date – favorite color, favorite movie, childhood pets – and had never run away from the answers. Before Joseph, Jack had never truly known what it was to feel accepted.

 

For a while, Jack reflected bitterly, he’d – they’d – actually been happy – been _allowed_ to be happy – because nobody had known. Just him and Joseph, together in a secret that they had both been happy to keep, because it meant they got to keep each other. Jack thought back to what he considered the happiest night of his life, a memory he only allowed to resurface nowadays when he was drunk or brooding. Tonight, he was both, so he allowed his mind to wander back to a place that, unfortunately, it knew all too well.

 

-

 

He and Joseph had been nineteen when they started seeing each other. They’d met at a club one night and the attraction had been instantaneous: Jack sought the youth and hope radiating from Joseph like one seeks water in a desert, and Joseph was inexplicably pulled in by the mystery of Jack, intoxicated by the need he felt to dig deeper and expose what was underneath his cold, formal exterior. It had only taken a few dates before Joseph was getting what he wanted – Jack was able to relax around him, to be himself, to not take everything so seriously for what seemed like the first time in his entire life. Jack began to plan their meetings more and more often, each feeling like a much-needed taste of freedom. They talked almost every day and were made essentially inseparable by technology and the occasional message delivered by Jack’s most trusted assistants. Youth and what he felt for Joseph gave Jack a kind of courage that he’d never experienced before and he began to think ahead, to imagine a future that he, and not his mother or his father or some soulless cabinet member, had planned. For the first time since he was a child, Jack began to dream.

 

The night of Jack and Joseph’s six-month anniversary also happened to fall on Joseph’s twentieth birthday. As a result, Joseph awoke in his apartment to find a fairly small but ornate paper box and a white card sitting on his bedside table. He saw his name in Jack’s handwriting on the outside of the card and smiled to himself, no doubt one of Jack’s henchmen had somehow slipped the surprise in there while Joseph had still been sleeping. The thought was definitely a little unsettling, but at the same time it so spontaneous, so secretive – so, so Jack. Joseph continued to smile as he opened up the card, taking in the neatly scrawled message in the center.

_The engraving on the back is something my father used to always quote to me, and it made me think of you. Of us, actually. Thank you for the past six months. I hope today is everything you deserve and more. I’ll see you tonight. –J_

 

Joseph opened the box, his eyes bright and curious and smile still in place until he saw the contents of the box and his face opened up into an expression of awe. Inside was the most beautiful white gold watch he had ever laid eyes on. He thought of the card again and flipped the watch over to read the quote engraved on the back:

_Time does not change us. It just unfolds us. –Max Frisch_

 

Joseph smiled softly. The combination of elegance and sentimentality in the gift were so _Jack_ that he thought he could actually feel his heart expand in response. He slid the watch onto his left wrist and marveled at how it fit perfectly before sliding out of bed to get dressed, Jack’s words sounding throughout his mind and causing nervous anticipation as he contemplated what to wear.

_I’ll see you tonight._

 

-

 

Punctual as ever, Joseph heard a knock on his door at seven p.m. on the dot. He ran a hand through his hair a couple times and straightened his jacket before answering.

 

And then there, leaning against the door frame was Jack, handsome as ever. His dark gray jacket and blue button-down complimented the hidden softness in his eyes and one strand of hair fell out of his normally perfect part. He brushed it away hastily before looking up at Joseph, his usual brooding expression breaking into a playful smile.

 

“Hi.”

 

This was one of the things that Joseph actually liked, if not loved, about the secrecy of their relationship. He got to see a Jack that absolutely nobody else saw. The brooding, stoic, Armani-clad prince became a casual, interesting boy around Joseph. He could have hairs out of place and wear shoes that didn’t match his jacket and laugh and just _be_. Joseph held on to that Jack, _his_ Jack, for as long as he possibly could, wishing he could let go less and less each time.

 

Joseph swallowed before returning Jack’s greeting with a, “Hey.”

 

Jack slowly stepped into the doorway towards Joseph. “So…” he said, tilting his head, “I was looking for my boyfriend, but I’m a little worried I have the wrong room, because he doesn’t seem very excited to see me…” He was about a foot away from Joseph now, his eyebrows drawn together and lips turned down in a pretend pout.

 

Joseph stepped towards him and kissed him softly, breaking the connection between them but keeping his eyes closed for a few seconds to take in the joy and simplicity of the moment. When he opened them again, Jack was blinking a few times. Joseph smiled, knowing he’d caught him off guard.

 

“No,” Joseph said playfully, “You have the right apartment.”

 

“Good,” Jack said, smiling, “it would have been really awkward to have your gift delivered to the wrong address.”

 

Joseph pulled back his sleeve to show Jack that he was wearing the watch. “Haven’t taken it off since I opened it,” he said, and then surprised Jack again, this time resting his forehead against the other boy’s when he broke the kiss. “Thank you,” he added softly, “it’s beautiful.”

 

Jack blinked again and slowly looked into the other boy’s eyes, his breath evening as he said, “You have to warn me the next time you’re going to do that.”

 

Joseph lifted his head and raised his eyebrows. “But where’s the fun in that?”

 

Jack raised an eyebrow in return, “If we never leave you’ll never see what I have planned for tonight.”

 

“So there’s a possibility we’ll never leave?”

 

“Just shut up and come with me before I start agreeing with you,” Jack said huffily, taking Joseph’s hand and leading him out the door.

 

The two of them walked out on to the street, where Jack led them to a limo that was parked a few blocks away, checking over his shoulder every now and then to make sure nobody was watching them – ever since he’d turned eighteen, pictures of him were selling for higher and higher prices. They made it to the car without incident and Jack slid in, motioning for Joseph to sit next to him. Joseph obliged and the two of them leaned into each other, shoulders touching. Jack covered Joseph’s hand with his own and shot a smile at him before turning to give the driver an address. They sat like that the entire car ride, every part of their arms and hands that touched warmer than the rest. Joseph knew that Jack was uncomfortable doing anything else with the driver ten feet away from them, privacy window or not, but he found he didn’t mind in the slightest. He felt comfortable and safe; satisfied to do nothing but take in Jack’s profile for the rest of his life, from his strong jaw to the way his pale eyes reflected the streetlights as they flew past. Joseph sighed and wished, for the millionth time, that he could capture a moment exactly as it was and preserve it that way in his memory. He wanted to be able to recall this peace, this stability whenever possible. He wanted a way to keep the gold flecks in Jack’s eyes and see them again whenever his world seemed dark. He wanted to hold on to this feeling of nervous anticipation mingled with affection, to bottle it up and unleash it whenever loneliness somehow crept back into his life. He wanted to never stop making hideously poetic wishes because that was just what Jack did to him. He just wanted to stay this way forever.

 

But then the limo came to a stop outside a small park. As he helped Jack out of the car, Joseph realized that it had somehow gotten considerably darker in the fifteen or so minutes they’d been driving. He blinked, allowing his eyes to adjust to the murky night before turning to Jack and shooting him a questioning look. Of course, all he got in return was a small smile as Jack took his hand and led him towards the park.

 

They stumbled along in the dark for a while, Jack maneuvering them in between trees and around benches before they got to a clearing in the middle – a perfect expanse of manicured lawn except for a blanket and a few lit candles that lay a few feet away.

 

Joseph shot another puzzled glance at Jack. “Uh,” he began, “this is really romantic, and everything, even if it’s probably a fire hazard, but is there any reason we needed to come to a park in the dead of night for this?”

 

Jack smiled and gestured to the blanket. “Lie down,” he told him.

 

“I’m sorry?”

 

Jack laughed, “Don’t be a jackass. Lie down and look up.”

 

Joseph lowered himself onto the blanket and rested his head on the grass, his breath catching a little when he realized why Jack had brought him there.

 

Above the trees and buildings were a million stars, each more brilliant than the next. They peppered the night sky, illuminating things in a way Joseph had never thought possible. As their light danced before hiseyes, he slowly turned to Jack, eyebrows raised in awe.

 

“I’ve never seen this many before. I’ve always lived in the city.”

 

Jack sat down on the blanket next to him and looked up, his eyes bright with wonderment of their own, before he directed his attention back to Joseph and said, smirking, “I know. And, just for the record, it isn’t the dead of night. It’s only seven thirty.”

 

Joseph’s eyebrows drew together. “Then how…?”

 

Jack shrugged and twirled a fraying edge of the blanket around his finger. “I may or may not have ordered that the power to every building and street light within a half-mile radius of this park be cut off until tomorrow morning.”

 

Joseph laughed, but stopped when he saw the amused look on Jack’s face. “Wait… you’re serious?”

 

Jack raised his eyebrows and shrugged again, “I’m the prince. Call it an electrical rehabilitation of this sector of the city.”

 

Joseph grinned up at Jack. “Authoritative _and_ smart,” he said, “How did I get so lucky?”

 

Jack narrowed his eyes. “Well, you forgot devastatingly handsome, so…”

 

Joseph laughed and took Jack’s hand in his, shifting so that they could lie down next to each other. “No, he said, lacing their fingers together, “I didn’t.”

 

They stayed like that for a while, content as they’d been in the limo. Simply being together was enough, had always been enough, but the stars and the idea that all of this was for him – for them – mixed with the usual euphoria that came along with just being in Jack’s presence made Joseph feel as though his heart would surely overflow. Somehow he was radiating the pure joy he felt in that moment; somehow Jack knew that he was making him feel this way, that he wanted it to be this way forever – just the two of them and the stars and the knowledge that their hands fit perfectly together.

 

Jack shifted a little to look at Joseph and said, so soft it was almost a whisper, “I almost forgot to tell you in person. Happy birthday.”

 

Joseph smiled up at the stars before turning to Jack and stroking his hand with his thumb. “Happy six months.”

 

Jack breathed out slowly through his nose. “Six months,” he repeated, as though he barely believed the idea himself. He fixed his gaze on Joseph for a while, as though he were contemplating something and the answer lay beyond Joseph’s eyes. After a moment, he looked away and added quietly, “Probably the best six months of my life.”

 

Joseph bit his lip to keep from grinning, not wanting to break the moment. He watched Jack watch the stars, the lights of the candles dancing across his face and illuminating depths of his skin that Joseph tried to etch into his memory, to capture every shadow and second, every shallow breath as they lay there.

 

“Jack?” he asked, turning his head to the stars in an attempt to draw strength from their newfound beauty.

 

“Yeah?”

 

Joseph paused, licking his lips before responding, his heart all of a sudden pounding as though it intended to escape him; his thoughts swimming, jumbling together until only one thing was on his mind. One thing that he needed to say, that he should have said long ago.

 

“I love you.”

 

Joseph waited a few moments before looking hesitantly at Jack. He was nervous to find Jack looking right back at him, watery blue eyes reflecting a million thoughts and fears and questions. After another painful few seconds, Jack breathed out and smiled, letting go of a nervous laugh before taking a deep breath and turning to face Joseph.

 

“I love you, too.”

 

-

 

As Jack sat at the bar, staring into his glass of whiskey, he thought about how he’d gotten there. Thought about how he’d still seen the gleam of the watch on Joseph’s wrist as he’d been cast out onto the street. He thought about how he wasn’t allowed to be with the one person who had never given up on him and, it seemed, still wouldn’t.

 

But, most of all, he thought about the last words Joseph had said to him before he’d had him thrown out, thought about them so much that they began to skip in his head like a cruel record.

_But, I love you._

 

Jack swallowed and hung his head, attempting to stop tears that were stinging the corners of his eyes. He thought, ironically, about how he’d responded the same way to those same words long ago. These, however, were not tears of joy, did not come in response to the feeling that his heart was full. This time he felt as though he’d been hollowed out, emptied of the feelings he once cherished and held on to. These tears were the last bits of life, of love draining out of him, mingling with his whiskey as he raised the glass to his lips.

 

Jack took a shuddery breath and gave his response, so softly that he knew it would get lost among the pounding music and chatter of the club.

 

“I love you, too.”


End file.
